Llaman Government Sees No Need for FTA With Britain

Now that we know how to cook bacon and eggs, how can the British help us?

Despite repeated requests from the British Trade Office, the Llaman Government has resisted overtures to negotiate a Free Trade Agreement (“FTA”) with Britain. As Prime Minister, Theresa May, implements the  ‘hard Brexit’ strategy from the European Union, the British Trade Office is desperately seeking FTA’s with other countries to maintain their export base.

When questioned by The Times reporters, Llaman trade negotiators said they saw little value in an FTA with Britain: “What do they have that we need? We know how to cook bacon and eggs, their “bangers and mash” is best left to history, nobody in the world likes their beer and enough said about their banking standards. What do they have we need?”.

He went on to say that the Llaman Government was suspicious of the British negotiating position of having ‘freedom of movement’ between the two countries. “Why is such a position included in an FTA negotiation?”, he said. “We suspect it is simply unfettered immigration in disguise as the British seeks to flee their cold, damp, miserable weather for the sun, sand and surf of Redondo Beach. We will not be fooled”, he said.

The British Trade Office was not given the opportunity to comment on this article and they denied the non-opportunity.